Oopsie daisy...

Wow… over a month. That may be the longest I’ve ever gone without blogging. Since November 25th, I have (in roughly chronological order):

-Attended the Dallas Cowboys Thanksgiving Day game
-Celebrated Thanksgiving with my family and Lance’s family
-Braved the Black Friday crowds to do some shopping
-Put up my Christmas tree/decorations
-Went to the firm Christmas party and won a $100 DSW gift card
-Shopped with one of my friends from work (first outside-of-work thing with a work friend)
-Helped hostess a baby shower (and held Levi while he took a sweet little nap in my arms)
-Hosted Bunko at my house
-Had dinner with a friend that I hadn’t seen in months
-Attended a junior high Christmas party
-Took a day off work to do all my Christmas shopping (and yes, dragged Lance along too)
-Went to a friend’s graduation party (for his masters)
-Made 8 batches of fudge
-Went to the Legacy staff Christmas party
-Wrapped every single gift under our tree… except for the 3 Lance wrapped on Christmas Eve (Yes, I did indeed wrap many gifts for myself.)
-Attended the Legacy Family Christmas program (while Lance went to a Cowboys game)
-Participated in Secret Santa at work
-Bought a Snuggie for my Secret Santa person (it was on her list!)
-Attended the UT/UNC basketball game at Cowboys Stadium
-Planned/hosted the young marrieds Christmas party
-Purchased a DSLR camera (waiting for it to be shipped…)
-Had a white Christmas!
-Watched It’s a Wonderful Life with Lance (it was the first time he’d ever seen it!)
-Celebrated Christmas with my family and Lance’s family
-Saw Avatar in 3D on Christmas Day
-Purchased next year’s Christmas necessities (boxes, tissue paper, wrapping paper, bowls to send fudge to Lance’s office, etc.) the day after Christmas… and let me tell you – the Christmas spirit ends at midnight on Christmas night. Walmart was full of Negative Nancies that morning!
-Played with the day-old puppies Lance’s brother’s dog had on Christmas morning
-Came down with some kind of ugly allergy/sinus/cold thing that I am not enjoying in the least
-Returned to work after a splendid 4-day weekend

I am incredibly sad that Christmas is over… but I had a wonderful holiday and am so thankful for all of my precious friends and family. I just feel like I have so many things to be thankful for! Anyway, sorry for the blogging hiatus, but it has been a very busy time! Hopefully I will do better soon…

I guess I could make it a new year’s resolution… but I always fail at those…

the thankfulness post

Since I’m 25 and Thanksgiving is right around the corner, here are 25 of the things I am the most thankful for:

1. The love of my life. I keep thinking that I couldn’t love him more if I tried… but then I end up loving him more anyway.
2. My wonderful family. I’m so blessed to not only love but actually LIKE my mom, dad, and sister!
3. My cozy house. I’m loving making it ours. I never seem to be done with it… but I’m enjoying the ride… and the progress.
4. Our little pup. We rescued him four years ago now, and he is just a great little dog. Until we have babies, he is a great substitute baby!
5. Our church family. We are so blessed to have friends of all ages (most miraculously – our own age!) at our church. It genuinely makes it feel like family.
6. My now-paid-off car. It keeps the rain out (the Saturn did not) and gets great gas mileage. Everything else is just icing on the cake.
7. The basics. I am thankful that I never question whether I will have anything to eat for the next meal or whether I will have a place to sleep that night or whether I could get very sick and not have access to healthcare or anyone to take care of me. As much as I complain about the costs of food and housing and healthcare, I wouldn’t trade it for the alternative.
8. Our health. We have gone through seasons of poor health, and I am thankful to be healthy and strong.
9. Music. There is something about music that just speaks to my soul… and nothing blesses me more than a Rich Mullins/Third Day/Casting Crowns/Mercy Me/Nicole Nordeman/Caedmon’s mix.
10. My job. Although still trying to determine my trajectory in life, I am incredibly thankful for my job. I am a happier, less-stressed person because of it.
11. Opportunities. I feel like the Lord is really putting me in positions where He can use me. I’m certainly a flawed instrument, but I am thankful He is using me!
12. My friends. I feel so blessed to have friends that genuinely care about me. Some are college friends, and I am pretty much positive that we will be pals forever. I love that.
13. The holidays. I am thrilled to have a few days off work to spend with family and doing fun holiday-ish things like I love. Plus we have like 4 or 5 different Christmas parties this year.
14. Our upcoming trip. I haven’t taken a vacation in about 16 months now (it will be almost 2 years total by the time we leave), and I am looking SO forward to our trip to Europe . It gives me something to hope for and dream about.
15. Chapstick. I would be absolutely miserable without it. When my lips get chapped, I purse them and stop talking. Without Chapstick, I might be mute. (Others might be thankful for that, but I would certainly not be.)
16. Affection. I don’t think I would survive in a world without hugs and physical touch. It is absolutely essential to my existence.
17. Other ministry families. It has been an incredible blessing to spend time with some other youth ministers/wives that understand what this crazy life is like. I am so thankful to have that network and support.
18. Kids. I really love children… and most of the time, they love me back. I love that. That blesses my heart.
19. Sunrises and sunsets. I think they are just incredible evidence of God’s creativity. Every one is unique.
20. A happy marriage. (I know this seems tied to #1, but bear with me.) Lately, I have been saddened to realize how many marriages include putting each other down and treating each other badly… even in public. Lance and I are not perfect, but we are happy… and we try to reflect that in the ways we talk to each other and about each other. I am thankful for that.
21. Acts of service. I love the opportunities that arise even in small acts of service. For example, last week, I took dinner to some friends that just had a baby. I ended up talking to them for almost an hour… and I put that sweet baby to sleep in my arms about 10 minutes into the visit and just snuggled her for the rest of the time. I went to bless them but ended up being blessed myself!
22. Modern conveniences. I am so thankful to have a nice washer and dryer and microwave and cell phone and computer and DVR (oh, I love DVR!) and a Scentsy pot and a dishwasher… my life would be even more complicated without the little things I sometimes take for granted. (Okay, my life would not be any more complicated without a Scentsy pot, but it is a nice addition anyway.)
23. Maturity. In no way am I through growing, but I am thankful that I can see progress in myself. It lets me know that all of the things I experience really are shaping me.
24. Others’ sacrifices. I’m thankful that soldiers have given their lives to protect me and shield my freedoms. I’m thankful that my parents sacrificed to put me through Christian school and through a private college. I absolutely would not be where I am today (or who I am today) if others had not paved the way for me to be here.
25. A lot of things about God:

• His faithfulness.
• The way He listens to my prayers and answers them specifically.
• His sense of humor.
• The way He pursues and romances me. His grace.
• The way that He knows me intimately and desires for me to know Him intimately.
• His Son.
• The way He speaks to me.
• His love.
• The fact that He gave us the Bible (and the fact that I have access to it).
• His justice.
• The freedom we have in His Spirit.
• The fact that the Spirit intercedes (I know the Spirit has had to intercede for me a LOT).
• There’s more. I am thankful that there is even more than THAT to be thankful for about God!

smiles in my heart

Well, the last few months have been a roller coaster, and I have very little doubt that the next few months will continue to be a roller coaster, but let me share some things in my life that cause me to praise the Lord:

• We paid my car off this week! I am thrilled about that because that means we are making progress toward getting out of debt… and it also means that we are inching ever closer to being able to start a family. (I’m assuming that the like 3 people that read this know me quite well… but I long to be a stay-at-home mommy when I have little ones, so we are working very hard to make that happen, and we have to get some of this stuff paid off to achieve that goal.)
• My shoulder is doing much better! I still have “on” days and “off” days, but overall, I am feeling MUCH better, and I have even been able to hold babies without pain. Thank you, Lord! (Just FYI – I still have the divot and probably always will… but I am fully content to be pain-free and divot-ful.)
• I ran two miles a couple of weeks ago! Granted, I’ve been a lazy bum for the last couple of weeks, so I have only run one or two days since then… but I had never ever run that far in my life. Also granted, I think it took me 30 minutes to run 2 miles… but let’s not talk about that. [Writer’s note: A few months ago, I said I was praying for the day that I could say, “I went all day today without pain AND I ran two miles.” Praise the Lord! That day is here!]
• I am officially started on my Christmas shopping! I’m done buying gifts for Sister’s fiancé, I’m almost done with Mom, and I’m making progress on Dad and Sister. Lance isn’t sure what he wants, and we have NO idea what his mom and brother want, so I’m nowhere near done… but progress is a good thing!
• I have two days off work next week! I’m very excited to have the Thanksgiving holidays coming up. I love spending time with my family and having some time off work… and it means I get to set up my house for Christmas! HOOOOOray!
• Our house is getting prettier! This past weekend, my friend Corie’s dad (who is a general contractor) came and began installing crown molding at our house. While he did that, I painted in our bathroom. The weekend before, we painted trim in our entry hall. Things look all construction zone-y at our house right now, but it is looking more like we want it to look… and closer to actually being DONE, which is pretty remarkable. I’m starting to believe that we’ll never actually be DONE, but I am excited about crossing a few things off the list.
• We are at peace. We have had a lot of things going on the past few weeks. We’ve had some big decisions to make (we finally made them – hooray!), and we have felt a constant sense of uneasiness as we tried to make the best decision possible. We finally have some peace back. I have to say, though, that I am incredibly, overwhelmingly blessed to be married to Lance. In the midst of constant strife, we did not fight with each other. We never went to bed angry. We were each other’s support and encouragement. It is a tremendous blessing to be married to someone who views marriage as a priority and a ministry.

Thanks for all the blessings, Lord. I appreciate them.

the countdown begins…

There are only 42 days until Christmas! Oh my word, I love Christmas. I am so excited to drag out all of my decorations and begin my Christmas shopping… well, continue my Christmas shopping, I guess. I already ordered my mom’s gift (super cute! I would post it on here, but I think she checks this thing sometimes…). Lance has a guys’ night at church tonight, so he will be gone until midnight, so I am taking tonight to do a little shopping on my own. I prefer to already have gifts purchased by Thanksgiving so that I can put up my tree the day after Thanksgiving and not have it be all nakey underneath. In order to achieve that, I try to do at least half my shopping in November and have the gifts already wrapped before Thanksgiving. I may be a little obsessed… I am much more interested in the interior of my house than the exterior. We usually wrap our tree trunk in lights, but that’s about all we do outside. Inside, though, we put up the tree (always with gifts!), decorate the mantle, hang stockings, burn Christmas candles, have a Christmas centerpiece on the dining room table, hang up all the Christmas cards we receive… Well, I say “we,” but I guess that’s really me. Lance just indulges my Christmas obsession and helps out where he can (or where he has to since I’m so short and he’s so tall). Anyway, I’m excited. I already numbered my calendar to count down to Christmas, so it gives me something to look forward to every day.

And I know Christmas is kind of consumery now (okay, really consumery), but I love the time with family, and I love seeing people’s faces light up when you get the perfect gift or completely surprise them. I love eating cinnamon rolls with Lance on Christmas morning. I love hearing Christmas songs on the radio and (sometimes) singing them in church. I love hearing “Happy Birthday, Jesus” from time to time (cheese, I know). I love wearing scarves and coats and going to the mall and seeing all the little guys waiting in line to see Santa. I love making lots of fudge and cookies (I bought cookie cutters for this year… something to look forward to!). I love wrapping gifts. I love opening gifts. I love buying Buddy Christmas gifts even though he has no idea what’s going on. I just love it. And I love that everyone knows the story of Jesus’ birth. Whether they heard it from Linus or a Sunday school teacher, they know the story. I love that.

Basically, I’m counting the days. Very literally. Merry Christmas Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve Eve!

catching up still - state fair

Lance had never been to the State Fair ever in his life! Isn't that crazy?! I just HAD to take him, and I took a Tuesday off work so we could go on Dr. Pepper Tuesday ($3 instead of $15 to get in!). Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand it rained that Tuesday. A lot. Ha. We had fun anyway though. We stayed at the fair for a couple of hours and then decided to make the most of a free day and went and saw a movie and just had fun all day. Here are some State Fair pics...

Us in front of Big Tex. Lance was a bit underwhelmed by Big Tex talking... but we listened to his whole speech anyway!

Lance's favorite part was sitting in all the new Chevy Camaros...

We got fabulous fried State Fair goodness - corny dogs for Lance and funnel cake for me!

There's no place I'd rather be than with my sweet hubs... even in the middle of the fair in the pouring down rain. We really had a great time. And then we got in the car and immediately shed our socks and shoes (they were nasty wet)....

Hopefully we'll get to go back again... in the sunshine this time!

just another reason i love jesus

Just yesterday, I was pondering what I should blog about since I have still been too lazy to upload state fair pictures onto my computer. After awhile, I decided I should write about how just desperate I have been for the Lord lately. I mean, everything goes through seasons, and I have just been in a season of constant longing for God to be present in my life. And it has been really cool. Truly – just yesterday, I was pondering how great it feels to be close to the Lord.

And then another storm hit. Somehow I managed to make one of my friends mad at me… just by being myself, really. I didn’t do anything – especially intentionally – to make this person get upset… but it happened. Again. Like it always seems to. I was really upset when I first found out. There were tears… and I only ate about 5 bites of supper before I just had to put it away because I wasn’t hungry anymore. I had my iPod playing my Christian music mix, and somehow it just played all my favorites – If You Want Me To (Ginny Owens), Shaking Like a Leaf (Rich Mullins), This World Has Nothing for Me (Caedmon’s), Let It Go (Superchick – random, I know), Underdog (Audio Adrenaline), Man of No Reputation… I mean, just great song after great song. It just encouraged me and reminded me that this life is so transient – and I have an infinitely wonderful Father who loves me like crazy… and a Savior who endured lots of pain and feels my hurt.

As I was getting ready for bed, I was thanking God for drawing me so near to Him right before this happened. I was still blue, though. I mean, it’s hard to realize (yet again) that your personality tends to tick people off or push people away. I’ve wrestled with that enough in my lifetime; I would prefer not to cry those same tears again. It didn’t rock me to my core this time like it has in the past… and I knew that was because of the closeness I have felt with the Lord lately.

Lance and I got in bed and were just kind of talking. We started talking about how the Lord answers me with very specific signs when I ask for them (I will definitely have to do a blog post on that in the future…) and what a blessing that is to hear a word from the Lord like that. Then we kind of got quiet… just lying there in the dark. I’ll be honest – my heart was aching. Not breaking, but definitely aching.

In the silence, I asked God for Lance to tell me just that he liked me… and I would take that as my word from Him that He created me and loves me. Then I kind of backpedaled out of that and said, “No, Lord, I know that you made me… I’m just struggling and need some encouragement. But I know you made me and love me.”

After several minutes of silence, Lance just goes, “I think you’re special.”

And I burst into tears. Of course, then I am trying desperately to explain through my sobs and sniffles that he just blessed me beyond what he knew. And I felt so comforted. I slept in great peace… because I am absolutely adored by my King… and He went out of His way to tell me that.

~~~~~~~~~

How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! – 1 John 3:1

catching up... cowboys stadium

Our church group took a tour of the new Cowboys Stadium awhile back, and that stadium is absolutely incredible.

Lance and me...

Apparently it takes a lot of escalators to get all those fans around that place...

The TV screen was mind-boggling. Apparently the Jonas Brothers got to play xbox on it. Now Lance wishes he was famous enough to have Cowboys Stadium bow to his every whim. Maybe someday. :)

We went into the locker room... and it was super cool, but it already smelled like feet. Expensive, well-paid feet... but feet nonetheless.

Romo and Witten's lockers. They're besties - like Lance and me. :)

Acting out my favorite thing Marion Barber does. In front of his locker. I really love when he stiff-arms people in the face. Maybe I have some pent-up rage....

It really is a beautiful place!

Last but not least.... our tour guide was one of the architects of the place, and he gave every detail about every single thing. It turned a 1-hour tour into at least 2 hours. Like - the gift shop was closed by the time we got done. Anyway, he was wearing hysterical socks, so I took a picture of his feet. Everyone laughed at me. Really though - hysterical.

coming soon, i promise...

As is par for the course of my life, we have been going 90 to nothin’ lately. Grandpa’s funeral and such were on Friday; then Saturday was Giveaway Day; then Sunday we had a parents lunch and an area-wide youth thing (followed by dinner); then Tuesday I took the day off so we could to the fair (for Lance’s very first time in life!), and it rained, so we only spent a little time there and then went to see a movie and to Lance’s high school’s choir concert; then Wednesday was church; and now I am leaving for a junior high retreat right after work today. (I’m only staying until tomorrow morning though – my sister is also coming to visit me this weekend, so we will have a girls only day on Saturday!)

Anyway, I have Cowboys Stadium pictures, State Fair pictures, etc… I just need to find the time to make those magically appear on my blog! Maybe if Sister has homework this weekend, I will do it then. Or something.

the past week

I had written a very cheerful and incredibly optimistic update that I was about to post (well, just as soon as I added the pictures to it)... and then my grandfather passed away this last Wednesday. Things moved very quickly - the visitation was Thursday night, and the funeral was on Friday. My sweet husband led some songs and was a pallbearer. To be honest, my grandfather and I weren't very close, so his passing is hard mostly because I don't have any grandparents any more.

Anyway, I'm still sorting through some of the weird emotions from all of this... but I will post the more cheerful update at some point soon.

divot update

Last Wednesday, I went to see my ortho guy, and (first of all, I waited like 45 minutes to see him because the EMG doctor hadn’t sent over my test results yet…) he told me that my MRI is definitely clear and that my EMG was normal too. He said the divot was caused by a steroid shot I got when I was sick back in March.

Note to self: Self, never get a steroid shot again. The end.

He told me that the best thing he could recommend for me was to get a second opinion. I have to be honest – that is the first time a doctor has ever told me to just go somewhere else. I certainly appreciated his honesty, but I was a little frustrated by the fact that he didn’t know what was wrong.

Anyway, my college doctor (the one who diagnosed my lipoma and then took care of me when I was holey) just moved to Southlake and opened a practice up there, so I went to see him on Wednesday afternoon.

He agreed that the divot was caused by the steroid shot and said that he thinks all the pain I’ve had is because my shoulder didn’t heal correctly from that car accident in 2001. He said I should rest my shoulder and then try to strengthen the muscles around the joint in the hope that that will provide enough strength/stability. If that doesn’t work, then I will have something called prolotherapy in an attempt to tighten up the joint itself.

I’m having a hard time though… mostly because I’m still in pain. Some moments are worse than others… but last night/this morning, I’ve been in a lot of pain. It’s frustrating. I’m trying to do everything I’m supposed to… but it’s hard when it hurts. And right now, it hurts.

And I’m afraid that I’m losing momentum in my new-found running. I was up to 1.5 miles a day, but now I haven’t run in nearly two weeks. I’m not sure what to do about that.

I’m determined to talk about happier things, though. We toured the new Cowboys Stadium on Saturday, so I will have to post pictures of that and talk about how fun that was sometime soon.

Until then, I would appreciate your prayers, and I eagerly anticipate sharing something like “I ran two miles and was pain-free all day today!” I’m just praying for that…

~~~~~~~

“Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.” – Psalm 27:14

emg

Well… the EMG was pretty awful. I cannot lie. I got stuck with needles in my arm, shoulder, and back. I got shocked in the forearm, upper arm, and neck. It took 2 hours. There’s not really a good way to sound like it was fun (other than just out-and-out lying, which I try not to do).

Results? My nerves are totally fine. Every test was normal. Yes, I have a giant divot (and it is ever deepening), but every nerve is transmitting properly. My muscles respond. Even the muscles/nerves IN the divot (yes, I got poked there too) responded completely normally. This is simultaneously wonderful and awful. I don’t want nerve damage. Nerve damage is terrible. The downside is that I’m still not sure what’s going on.

Oh, and here’s the way the appointment started: The doctor had me push against him and pull and do all kinds of things to test my strength. Then he goes, “Well, you have visible atrophy, but you have excellent strength, so that’s good. At least that means you don’t have Lou Gehrig’s Disease.”

WHAT?!?!

I had NO idea that was even a possibility.

I had prepared myself to be strong and super tough during this test… and right there, before I’d even been stabbed or shocked, I was choking back tears. Wow. I am absolutely thankful that that’s not what it is… but… wow… how scary.

My precious husband drove me to my appointment, and he came back after an hour, and the receptionist escorted him into the room where I was… and I had a needle sticking out of my arm, and I MIGHT have been crying. (I will neither confirm nor deny that possibility…) He came over and kind of rubbed my hair and had this terrified look on his face, so I said, “Why don’t you wait in the lobby until this is over?” And he did. And then he took me to Kincaid’s and to get ice cream and skipped church to take care of me. I love him.

Oh, PS, I was feeling like a wimp for crying during the test until the doctor told me that he had a guy pass out on the table once. Then I felt less wimpy. Ha.

Say a prayer for Wednesday. I go to see my orthopedic surgeon again, and I am praying that he knows something that the radiologist and the EMG man didn't know and that he can tell me what's going on. I am in increasingly more pain, and I want relief. Say a prayer that we can figure out how to make that happen for me.

the divot

I had my MRI last Tuesday morning, and I really didn’t think it would be any big deal (especially given that this was like my 6th or 7th MRI in my lifetime). This was the first MRI I’ve ever had where the doctor requested that it be done with contrast. He told me there would be an injection involved. I’m thinking, no big – something flu-shot-like. Well… I was wrong. Quite wrong. I had to sign separate releases just for the injection part… including one accepting or refusing a blood transfusion if necessary! They brought in a doctor to do the injection part (so I had a doctor, a nurse, and a tech in there) and had me lie on the Xray table (while they all wore lead vests and I wore a hospital gown). I actually don’t even know what all went on because I wouldn’t look. I know I got multiple shots of Lidocaine, but I don’t know how many. I know they stuck me several times for the actual dye injection part… but I mostly know that because I have a cluster of holes surrounded by a bruise. I know that at one point the doctor told me that I was doing really well – that she came off the table when she had this done. I know that later on, I yelped, and the doctor said, “Wow… you must take a long time to get numb. Most patients are totally numb by now!” (I also know that I received additional Lidocaine injections at that time.) I also know that at one point I had my head tilted back so that I wouldn’t see what was going on, so when I yelped, the tears that filled my eyes actually rolled up my face and over my ears.

Anyway, tomorrow (Wednesday) is the day of the EMG test, so I am even more nervie about that… given that this was supposed to be the easy breezy test. At some point in life, I must have really wronged my doctor. This is quite the revenge plan.

I don’t think the picture below does justice to the pain… but you can see the little holes and the bruise… and the divot in my arm. Pwetty!

Say a prayer for me tomorrow... I am super scared. The MRI was supposed to be the test that was no big deal at all, and I still have a bruise an entire week later. I'm ready to have nothing but sunshine and rainbows to talk about... but for today, I apprecaite your prayers. :)

how am i gonna live today? with a positive, positive, positive, positive attitude...

Well, I am trying to have a positive attitude anyway. If I am fully honest, I haven’t blogged recently due to the fact that I have had kind of a rough week.

Well, actually my rough week started in 2001.

Okay, that’s only partly true.

Basically, I got in a car accident in 2001 and hurt my shoulder. I did the physical therapy thing and haven’t really had an issue with it. Well, my left arm is longer than my right thanks to that… and my left shoulder slopes down, so I can’t keep any straps on my shoulder… and it sometimes ached when it would rain… okay, but other than THAT, it was fine. Anyway, at the beginning of the summer, Lance and I were driving to Best Buy, and he was playing the license plate game (basically like “slug bug” for out of state license plates), and he called “Ohio” and hit me in the arm. He never hits hard in this game… and I think he only plays it because I talk incessantly when we are in the car because he is a captive audience, so random state names are sometimes the only thing he has to add to the convo. Evs. Anyway, so I start BAWLING crying after he hits me. At first, he thought I was kidding… and then he got this shocked and kind of sickened look on his face and was like, “Wait… are you serious? Like, for real?” Anyway, it hurt for a little while and then stopped bothering me again.

And then I developed a divot.

I’m really not 100% sure what else to call it… it’s just… a divot. It’s in my left arm right at the bottom of my shoulder muscle, and there’s just a big crater-y thing in my arm. I wasn’t too sure about it, so I went to my family doctor and told him the whole story (yes, including the license plate game part), and he told me I had good range of motion and good strength, so I probably just needed physical therapy again. Well, I don’t really like physical therapy that much, and I figured that if I was okay, I didn’t need it desperately or anything.

And then the divot deepened.

(This sounds like the dumbest golf story of all time. Such is my life.)

I finally got nervie enough to schedule the physical therapy, but I was doubting whether that was what I actually needed, so I asked a guy from church who is a physical therapist to look at my shoulder and see whether he thought that PT would help or whether I should go see a specialist. We walked over to their house one evening last week (they live in our neighborhood), and he moved my arm all around… and even discovered that my arm could move around in the socket, which is notsogood. He said that he would recommend at least having an ortho guy take a look at it because he couldn’t really figure out exactly what would be wrong (whether neuro or muscular or whatever) and gave me the name of a guy he said was really good with shoulders.

Sooooo Monday I go see the ortho guy. I tell HIM the whole story, and he moves my shoulder all around too. And yes, he even moves it around in the socket to see how much motion there is… but he was MUCH rougher than Richard was. Anyway, now I have to go on Tuesday to get an MRI (and they will be injecting me with something… possibly in the shoulder – ouchie pouchie!), and then the next Wednesday, I have to go get a nerve test where they will poke me over and over with needles to see how my nerves/muscles respond. The doctor pre-apologized for the nerve test. I take that as a terrible sign. And – fabulous – I was sore for several days after my appointment, so that was not fun.

Depending on what these two tests reveal, I may be facing a surgery on my shoulder here pretty soon. I’m nervous about all of it – the tests, the appointments, the possible surgery, recovering, paying for all of it. I’ve been praying about it a lot, and I am hoping that great joy is just around the corner…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

PS – Update from previous post: Buddy is doing MUCH better (praise the Lord!) and really wants to be back to his normal, active self. We currently will not let him, which he does not appreciate… but we can tell he’s feeling a ton better, so we are thrilled with that. There – my daily dose of positivity.

poor buddy baby

My preshy dog hurt his tiny back, and he is just more pitiful than words can express. Lance took him to the vet today, so he now has two medications and is not allowed to jump AT ALL for 3 weeks. If you know my dog, you know a few things: 1. He already loves you. 2. He loves to jump. He jumps when he's happy and when he has to potty and when he wants to eat what you have and when you're holding a baby and when you walk in the front door and... well, he just loves to jump. I'm not sure how to keep his paws on terra firma for 3 weeks, but I will definitely try. And just because he's cute:

So say a little prayer for my pup and his back... and hopefully he will back to his old self in a few weeks!

chris lee's wedding

Our dear friend Chris got married at the end of July, and we had a wonderful time. If you want to see their beautiful professional pictures, you can see Erin's fabulous blog. She is incredibly talented. Wow. Here, though, you will just see pictures of Lance and me. So sorry.

Kasey Spain, my sweet freshman year across the hall neighbor (affectionately known as my ATH... and yes, I still call her that). And for some reason, my eyes are overly enthusiastic in this picture.

Sweet Aaron Rector. So glad he's back on our continent!

Awww Luke! Haven't seen this kiddo in forever.


My sweet loves Stefie and Katie. Such beautiful girls. It was just wonderful to see them and catch up with them.

Okay, so Lance, Chris, and I took this picture on the first day that Lance and I met... way back at Kadesh 2002. After that, we took it every six months through school... and on our graduation day and on the day Lance and I got married. Love it. I will have to hunt down some of those pics and post them. They are fabulous.

Um, and I just realized that I don't have a single picture with the bride. She was a beautiful one though! Congratulations to both of you... and thanks for giving me the opportunity to see lots of my friends! It was a wonderful night!

milestone day

Today, I ran a mile. That may not seem like any big deal… and if you’ve been running for years, it’s probably not to you. To me, though, this is huge. I haven’t been able to run a mile since… college? Maybe? I think I ran a mile like twice all the way through college. I am a terrible, terrible runner. And today, I ran a mile.

I’ve been getting up and running in the mornings before work. When I first started about a month ago, I could barely, BARELY finish a quarter of a mile. Yes, it’s sad. I know. Every day I have forced myself to run a bit (sometimes a matter of mere steps) further than the day before. Well, except for the day that Buddy wrapped his leash around a rosebush. I was too cranky to finish that day. Let’s not talk about that. I have a couple of goals in my new-found runningness: 1. I want to run at least a 5k. Maybe a 10k, but I get overwhelmed thinking about it, so I choose to focus on the 5k. 2. I want to run a mile in 8(ish) minutes. I have never, never done that.

I should also mention that my natural running stance is more like Phoebe than anyone else…

Like, it makes people laugh. I have been working very hard to run in a way that will not make people laugh. I guess that’s my third goal. 3. I want to run without anyone laughing at the way I run.

I also feel like I should mention how very, very much I hate mornings. Lance has a video of me attempting to hit him for trying to wake me up on our honeymoon. Youch. Anyway, I have been waking up early, and I have to say, that part is going far better than I’d anticipated. I get to see a sunrise every morning, and I start my day awed by my God and His creativity. It has been a blessing. Every morning, I sing in my head, “Who paints the skies into glorious day? Only the splendor of Jesus!” And this week, I’ve been running with my friend Lorrie and her dog Fudge (who is FAR better behaved than Buddy), and that has been great too! We spend our warm-up and cool-down time just talking about stuff. However, I can’t talk while running. Too hard.

Anyway, today is (quite literally) a milestone for me. Hopefully there are many more to come.

summer = almost over....

It’s hard to stay caught up when life is so busy! I genuinely thought I was going to get a break, but VBS was last week, and it was ridiculous too. I even skipped on Tuesday to go to the grocery store and was still absolutely exhausted. Plus there was a summer youth series at Legacy Thursday night. You know it’s a rough week when Friday is your only day to not do church stuff… And I must admit, my house was a disaster, and we had very few clean clothes. Yes, it’s true. And it wasn’t even bothering me until Thursday morning. I knocked a bunch of things over trying to get ready, and it made me so cranky. Anyway, Lance and I stayed home and just hung out Friday night… and then I spent all day Saturday cleaning while Lance was at a Kids for Christ rally thing. Oh yes… there was a church thing on Saturday too! We were also taking food to some folks who just had a baby and hosting small group at our house Sunday night, so I also made pork in the crockpot and baked 4 dozen cupcakes on Saturday… and then I begged to go swimming, so we went to some friends’ backyard (they weren’t even home!) and swam for awhile.

Since the last time I posted, probably the most exciting thing that’s happened was that my friend Chris Lee got married. (And that happened on July 31st, so obvi not much too terribly exciting has happened since then…) He is the one who introduced Lance and me, and he is very special to us. Chris and I were actually in an MPulse group together the summer between 7th and 8th grade and then were in a Kadesh group together the summer between 11th and 12th grade… and we have stayed friends ever since! The wedding was very sweet, and it was a tremendous blessing to see some college friends again… and I will have to post pictures soon… after I take the time to upload them.

Well, also, we had 18 people at our house for small group last night! I guess that’s exciting too! Holy moly! We were packed into our house, and we started running out of food there at the end… but it was a lot of fun. I am definitely going to have to find some more good recipes for large groups of people. I probably can’t make spaghetti every time!

Can I just tell you how ready I am for summer to be over? There is just too much going on in the summer to try to even breathe. I loved summer when I got to be a part of summer. When I just get to be extra-super-busy and husband-less but still working while it’s uber hot outside, summer loses some of its appeal. Yes, I am now 25, and summer is officially lame.

two whole weeks...

Nothing terribly eventful happened the week of Lance being at Cornerstone (praise the LORD! Cornerstone was when my mom was hospitalized last year…). Lance was gone from Sunday to Friday and came home on Friday (yes, with more tire trouble on this trip) and left for another camp on Sunday. During the approximately 36 hours he was home, this is what happened to my spotless house:

We washed pretty much everything he owns so that he could repack and leave again. It was out of control.

Sunday morning, Lance began loading his suitcases into my car. Buddy HATES suitcases because he is smart enough to know that they mean someone is leaving. He just cried and followed us around all morning. This was the heart-breaking sight I got to witness while Lance was loading the car:

(The people before us had cats, so we have a cat door into the garage. Buddy can fit through it but prefers not to. He mostly uses it as a giant peephole.)

I rode down to camp with Lance in an empty rental van (I bet we looked hysterical) and spent the day down at Three Mountain, explaining to everyone that, no, I will not be staying for camp because I have to work. I rode back with John West that evening, and he and I had a ridiculously long conversation about fruit. I didn’t think it was weird at the time until Lance asked me what we talked about, and I said “fruit” and then I realized it was weird. Evs.

To keep myself occupied when Lance was gone, I cleaned the house, watched SYTYCD, and shopped. Shopping is my activity of choice when Lance is gone. It’s one of the few things that I genuinely enjoy doing by myself. During the two weeks he’s been gone, I have purchased/ordered the following:

Plus some other assorted things... mostly things I deemed too boring to take pictures of/blog about. It’s a good thing he came back. I would have shopped us into the poor house. Well, that and I missed him like crazy.

Since Buddy was my little four-legged bestie for the past two weeks, here are a couple shots of him and his cuteness/hilariousness:

And now my love is home again, and all is right with the world!

almost caught up...

On Friday and Saturday, we got ready for Lance to go to camp and for me to help hostess a shower. We did lots of running errands and laundry and some working in the yard… I don’t even remember what all, but I know that I went to Walmart, Target, Hobby Lobby, the bank, took Lance to get a haircut, picked up a UHaul trailer, and Target again that day. Then that night I was dusting and knocked over something glass and cut my finger and started bleeding and made Lance clean up the broken glass. Yes, sometimes I’m a baby, and I’m okay with it.

On Sunday, Lance’s group left for Cornerstone during Bible class time. I always get sad when he leaves, but there were kids and parents and other assorted vagabonds (not really) all around when we said our goodbyes, so I tried to be strong. It’s times like that that I completely love my giant, Victoria Beckham-style, face-obscuring sunglasses. They hide tears like a champ. Anyway, he left, and I went to church. After church, I went back to Walmart (yes, again) and then went home and cleaned my house like crazy. I cleaned from maybe 12:30 or so until 2:30 and then got ready to head to the shower. I took my fondue fountain to the shower, so I had a ton of stuff to take – the fountain itself, the skewers, a vase to put the skewers in, the chocolate, some marshmallows and pretzels left over from the last usage, the paper goods, the glass plates and cups from the church, some ribbon, etc. I got there like 25 minutes before the shower was supposed to start (which was 5 minutes late for the early I was supposed to be) and hurriedly set up the fountain (people were already there and standing around!). About halfway through the shower, the dirty dishes are piling up, so my friend Corie and I started doing dishes… and never ever stopped. For like an entire hour, we stood at the sink washing dishes. The shower ended at 5:00… and small group was at my house at 5:30 (hence the hours of pre-shower cleaning)! I cleaned the fountain enough to stick it in the box (and splattered chocolate on the front of my khaki pants – super!) and threw all my stuff together and ran to my car. I pulled up to my house right at 5:30, and people were already arriving! I ran in, changed pants, and turned on some lamps/lit candles/tried to be a good hostess. Then, with guests there, I stain treated my pants. Um, hello, I cannot have a chocolate stain on my khaki pants. My guests can wait. We had small group until like 8:00 or so, then I ran up to Central Market to get my groceries for the week. You can tell what an exhausting day it was by the fact that this is one paragraph and one day.

I promise - more pictures/fewer words for the next post.

another busy week...

After the July 4th holiday weekend came another busy week. (Are you seeing a pattern here?) On Monday, we had Bunko, and I always have a lot of fun there. I sat with Stacey and Jenn (and another girl whose name I don’t remember, but let’s not tell her that) during dinner, and I love getting to hang out with them. They crack me up, and I don’t get to see them all that often. Plus, about halfway through the night, Jenn let me steal Abigail, so I got to snuggle a preshy little baby for the last half of the night. So fun!

Oh, plus I had a doctor’s appointment Monday morning and another one Tuesday afternoon. I did have a nurse/technician person whom I don’t think had ever drawn blood in her life. I’m a pretty easy case (I’m so pale that my skin is practically transparent), and I have had a lot of blood drawn in my lifetime without ever having any problems with it. Anyway, first this girl looked completely lost in the world when I asked her to do my left arm instead of my right since I was heading straight to work after the appointment and was worried I might be sore. She put the tourniquet on my arm and had me squeeze the ball thing and ran her finger back and forth across the inside of my elbow for – no lie – at least 30 seconds… before looking at me and going, “Do you know if you have good veins?” WHAT?! Talk about scaring a person to death! Anyway, it was a bit ouchie pouchie, but it didn’t bruise, so I guess I can’t complain too much. That’s the only interesting thing that happened at either doctor.

So then Wednesday, I picked up dinner and went straight to church after work (like always). I knew there was a girls’ lock-in, and I had planned to stay for like an hour, but I ended up staying until almost midnight. Yikes stripes. I am too old for that. I think the girls had fun though. They turned on the blacklights, wore neon clothes, and had a girls-only hilarious-dancing dance party.

This picture was my attempt at taking pictures of the dancing without a flash. It simultaneously makes me happy and makes me dizzy. (Notice that Jesus looks really sad in the background. That somehow makes these pictures more entertaining.)

Obviously, I was sleepy on Thursday (I AM 25 now, you know). Then Thursday night was a summer youth series at Richland Hills. It was great to be there (I saw Sister’s bf Brent), and the speaker was fabulous (as if Patrick Mead is ever unfabulous), and it was a lot of fun. I got home at like 8:30 and was just wiped out. I basically sat on the couch for like an hour until Lance got home and then went to bed. I’m so much fun.

I'm almost caught back up to real time...

july 4th

I guess the next major event post-birthdays was the July 4th celebration. I had July 3rd off work, which was just fabulous. Lance and I had a great Friday together, spending all day just hanging out and having fun. We touched up the paint in our bedroom and set up our brand new chair in the corner of our bedroom. It looks fabulous, and I love it.

That night, we went to the Rangers game with Philip and Jocelyn. We had the best seats in the house – the all-you-can-eat seats! It was hot, hot, hot out there. Our seats were in the top deck of the Home Run Porch, and if you went up the steps, there was a buffet of ballpark food – nachos, hot dogs, drinks, popcorn, peanuts, and grilled chicken sandwiches. I think the grilled chicken sandwich thing is weird, but I most certainly enjoyed my fair share of nachos.

Let’s be clear that this was for some reason an incredibly unflattering picture night. I’m not exactly sure why it was so bad for me. I had a great time, but I look pretty homely.

Lance and me...

Philip and Jocelyn... (and she looks better than me, and she's 8 1/2 months prego. FAB. She is a super cute pregnant girl though.)

The four of us...

There were fireworks after the game…

On Saturday, Lance and I went and saw Transformers II… and then we’d planned to go to Kincaid’s, but it was closed for the 4th. We went to Chili’s instead. Don’t worry – after church on Sunday, Lance took me to Kincaid’s so that I wouldn’t be disappointed. Then we went home, and Lance made homemade ice cream with our new ice cream maker to take to small group.

All around, it was a fantastic holiday. I'm super thrilled to live in the land of the free and the home of the brave... especially when it involves baseball, ballpark nachos, going to the movie theater and Kincaid's! What a great country!

our berfdays

Okay, so I am like WEEKS behind on major life events… but I have a good excuse: I have been ridiculously busy. That’s always my excuse… but I am always behind… and I am always busy, so I think it’s a valid one.

Well, for any of y’all that don’t know, Lance’s birthday and my birthday are super close together (his is June 25th; mine is June 27th), so we always have lots of birthday festivities. On Thursday night (his actual birthday), he had a summer youth series, so I went and got him a cookie cake while he was gone. (And yes, if you’re wondering whether I am just cheese enough to light candles and sing “happy birthday” by myself, I did.) We had some cookie cake and talked for awhile (since we hadn’t seen each other yet that day), and then it was bedtime.

Our tradition has been to celebrate birthdays on the 26th since it’s the day between, so we went to Cheesecake Factory on Friday night. I was so full that it was truly painful to breathe… and I brought home fully HALF of my meal. It was just fun to go on a date and spend time with my love. And I love this picture of us from just before dinner…

Saturday (my actual birthday) was the birthday marathon. Well, first of all, I had my Cheesecake Factory tiramisu for breakfast. Yeah, I’m pretty much a health nut. Then we drove to Arlington for birthdays with Lance’s family. We went to Splitsville, which was a really cool place. Apparently, I am WAY out of bowling shape (was I ever IN bowling shape??) because my booty was sore for days. The food was really good, and it was the cleanest bowling place I’ve ever been to. SUPER clean bathrooms too – bonus!! Then we came home and cleaned house for awhile, and then my family came over that night. It was great to see them and spend time with them. We don’t get to do it nearly enough. Aaaaaand it turns out that this is my ONLY picture from the day. Swell. Why do I carry a camera and then only take one picture?

I should point out that Patty made a cake, so we had cake with lunch… and my mom had made a cake, so we had cake with dinner (and take this moment to remember that I had tiramisu for breakfast), so we felt pretty roly-poly when we went to bed that night. It was definitely a fun weekend.

It’s pretty hard for me to believe I’m 25 now. I know, I’m still among the youngest of my group (my summer birthday has almost always made me the baby of my class), but it astounds me that I’ve been alive a quarter of a century. It just seems like a long time. In some ways, I still think of myself as like 18… but in other ways, I feel super old… so I guess 25 is a pretty good age for me. It’s just now beginning to sink in, which is saying something since my birthday was 2 weeks ago!

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“I lie down and sleep; I wake again because the Lord sustains me.”
Psalm 3:5

a new place to call home

Well, I blogged for a good long while at my last blog address... but I have decided to turn over a new leaf. A blogspot leaf. Some of my old posts were full of happiness, but many were filled with struggles and trials. I am hopeful that I can start over with a new URL, a new look, and yes, a new outlook as well. The Lord was incredibly faithful and amazingly mighty in every single situation I blogged about in my many wordpress months, and I am going to work hard to remember that through any trials that may come my way in the future.
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"The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing."
Zephaniah 3:17